Monday, February 15, 2010

The Bachelor: Second Rose Theory

I have a theory about the Bachelor: whichever lucky girl receives the second rose at the rose ceremony with the final three will be the winner.

The first girl to get a rose seems to be sailing through to the finale and maybe into the heart of the Bachelor. Her fan base feels confident. These fans are being set up for a fall by the producers. "I can't believe he didn't pick her in the end!"

The second girl to get a rose seems to be in jeopardy. Her fan base cringes after the first rose is given out. Who will get the last remaining rose? When her name is called, the fans breathe a sigh of relief. The producers have injected just enough tension. When this second girl is ultimately chosen, it will feel like a come-from behind victory, a fairy tale ending.

I'm putting together some data by sorting through Television Without Pity recaps, but if any readers know of a faster way to find this information, please let me know.

So far, of ten seasons of the Bachelor and Bachelorette that I've analyzed, my "Second Rose" theory correctly predicts the winner seven times.

And Vienna got the second rose tonight.

Just saying.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

"Dear Lost"

Dear Lost,

When our heroes descended into a subterranean lair on Tuesday night, my skin instantly started to crawl. Then I remembered.

The heroes might encounter a decomposing corpse or two.

They may be attacked by a monster made of smoke.

Mysterious Others may kidnap and torture them.

But no matter how deep into the lair they venture or how many nights they spend in the jungle or how many haunted cabins they visit at midnight with only a flickering lantern to guide them, there is one thing that you won't make me watch.

A single bug.

And for that, dear Lost, I thank you.